Aug 22, 2006

RAUMA, Norway:
Grieg's Hall of the Mountain King hammers over the loudspeakers. Edward and I wince, lunge for his iPod. And soon we have Green Day's Basket Case for balance, as the bus inches around the 11 famous hairpin turns of Trollstigen Road.

Around Norway with one earbud each...

Stir-crazy, I proceed to do several extremely stupid things, including reststop yoga – in high heels, no less. Then I wrench back my left fingers, damaged by a cat bite: "look, they're healed!" Finally I mix lemon vodka cocktails that almost kill my friend – never a heavy drinker – on the ferry.

Later, as my hand swells like the ego of Jacqueline Mackie Paisley Passey, I reflect on this sorry state of affairs.

"Edward, I'm not sure the boat-bus combination suits my temperament."

Still fish-belly-pale, he mumbles: "I just hope you cross the Arctic Circle for the first time, before you push someone overboard and get arrested."


  1. Anonymous12:59 AM

    That Jackie woman is the troll. The whaddyacallit: hulder?

  2. Hmmmm. She doesn't evidence the cat-pupils in the mugshot, but we all know the wonders of Photoshop...

    I just know this: I wouldn't even let an ex-boyfriend date her.