Mar 25, 2007

Ballard-Columbia City, SEATTLE – A certain romantic entanglement has brought unto me a world of Seattle Metro woes.

No, you can't hear more about my sweetheart. Road Remedies is not that sort of blog. But check out the consolation prize: a primer on the comedy of errors that is public transport here in the Emerald City! Go on, you know you want to...

Recently voters slammed down two propositions with a "no and hell no". They nixed a new highway viaduct downtown – as well as a tunnel (those who learn from the disaster of Boston's Big Dig are not doomed to repeat it).

Various solutions often target my neighborhood, Ballard. Once a sleepy Scandinavian fishing quarter, it boomed with bohos, then condos. But the bloody buses still run every 30 minutes... until, say, 9.30pm on a Friday, when they begin running downtown once an hour.

'Cause we wouldn't want public transport to promote carefree evenings out or anything. No, no, nooooo. Why replace a fine tradition of drunk-driving and mortgage-expensive, slow-to-respond taxis?

Anyway, returning to lighter themes: I ride the bus for the best of reasons, book in hand, iPod in pocket. And I only complain a little.

"I've met a lovely man," I wrote my friend Lisa in London. "Except he lives 12 miles across town."

"Did you mean 120?" she asked.

"No, 12. But it takes me 70-95 minutes on Seattle Metro."


  1. Awww, I think it's very sweet that you ride the bus for 1.5 hours to go see your sugarbear. This could be the basis of a good screenplay.

  2. Well, my honey's more the screenplay writer than me, but I'll pass the tip along.

    Imagine the scandalous movie that could result: old men lifting their kilts ... hijab infractions on the #7 ... the weird bus driver who kept miaowing (full disclosure: I largely missed this episode due to the iPod, but I'm sure events can be reconstructed via a few judicious Craigslist postings).

    One of my friends says I should not mess with a GU – Geographically Unsuitable – date. But I can't take his advice seriously, since he lives in Juneau and is flirting with an Anchorite...

  3. Oh no, I think you're on safe grounds, as long as your honeybeet is living in the same time zone ... that's the rule: a date can only be GU if he/she lives in another timezone.

  4. Honeybeet? Did you learn that one from Felicia's teddybear?

  5. Amanda, I'll never tell.

    Now quit wasting so much time on your blog and get on that bus to go see your candycakes.

  6. I might start grading, just so I can flunk you for that candycake comment, homeslice!

  7. Are you threatening me?

    Your muffinplum wouldn't be impressed by that, Amanda.