Sep 5, 2007

LOS ANGELES – I stop in the city of silky monsters en route to Micronesia. Here I discover I still got it.

I can make every head in a swank hotel lobby swivel. Oh yes.

Mainly by wandering through a wedding reception in a sarong and Speedo...*

My job – travel writing – often leads to such wardrobe dislocation. I once froze a convention in Hong Kong, disembarking the elevator on the wrong floor. Puddling chlorine, I brindled in my bathrobe. "You poor suits," I tried to telegraph. "We're all working, but my job is to play."

The finer philosophical implications may have been lost in translation.

*The pool proves pitiable, however: a sandbox-sized splasher. More sinkhole than swimming venue, it serves only two functions: to disinfect toddlers and concentrate bikinis for easy viewing. Ever sensitive to native customs, I retreat to the bar.


  1. Making heads swivel in a sarong and Speedo in a hotel in L.A.? You sound surprised that you can do that.

    I'm not at all.

    Glad you got in OK.

    You know who

  2. Haha, I hope no toddler peed in the pool.

  3. MER: Speedo would not be the preferred nomenclature of LA. But thanks nonetheless.

    DB: that pool is pure toddler pee. What are you thinking, man? We can't all live in beauteous, clinically-sterile Sweden!