WASP-WASTED

SALTSPRING ISLAND, British Columbia – Thanks to ferries, we arrived late at the B&B – a communal organic farm. Much, much too late to complain about the wasps in the barn's sleeping loft.

I trapped. He smashed. But ultimately, Miguel and I wound up sharing the single bed downstairs*.

Nothing like a romantic weekend away to set things right ... like one's posture.

*At the time, we were coupled up, so this wasn't a complete interpersonal trainwreck. Still, we bailed for the hotel of hooker-sprinkler-fame, where the clerk – in a fit of nostalgia for the dump-run truck – cut us a deal on a suite with not one, but TWO, king-sized beds.